Community: A short story

What does community mean to you?

#photo #authenticity #journey #writing #shortstories #personalstyle #poetry #shortshortstories #Facebook #Instagram #Compassion #globalsolidarity #community #healing

Day 7: Contemplations of a Life, Little Understood, and Lived, Nevertheless

Early morning, I just got back home from working, I saw Blackkklansman. Powerful filmmaking by Spike Lee. I’m still processing the depth of the connection made between our current reality and the plans the Klan had in the 1970s to infiltrate politics.

Conversations with friends lately seems to revolve around both change and how things seem to stay the same. Themes revolve and continue despite our best efforts or to spite them, perhaps. What is both the limitation of our ability to change reality as we know it and what can we accomplish in one lifetime?

I am familiar with where I came from when I re-located to the Twin Cities in 2010. My thoughts, my desires and what I felt I came here to accomplish. Confronted with adversity and a story, I had to live through to believe, I made it through each year goading myself, and consequently the Universe to bring me the fruits of my labor. I'm still not quite sure it hears me.

On various occasions, there’d be some victory or other. Only to discover, that wasn’t the end or the solution just another piece of the ever-growing puzzle.

Am I a knowledgeable metaphysician in charge of my own destiny? Or a pawn in some cosmic game of cat and mouse. And do we ever know the answer to that?

Given the world stage of climate change (it was rather hot this week), global politics with the leadership of insanity and stateman duking it out and our own seething turmoil of shame, destruction and sheer malice, it’s surprising how we survive. I am not sure anyone could have prepared me for what I am experiencing now. Underneath it all, perhaps we knew we were heading to the call, whatever that was. I don’t know.

I wake up daily, incredulous that two years after my MBA I am jobless (again) unable as yet, to break from the glass ceiling of my own self-containment. Whatever family or mental ailment has me stuck in this position. I defaulted to an admin career and moving forward, through and out of that into a career of possibility seems as intangible a thing as the existence of God.

Hope continues, each day the resumes continue to go out, the website is getting updated (to reflect the way I’d like to manage my consulting practice) and the MIMA work gets completed – two blogs today in fact!

Daily life does continue. The Dunn Bros coffee shop on Grand is consistently filled with students, professors and junk dealers. Somali men smoking their cigars, organizing affairs. Hipsters smoking their hand-rolled, debating climate change and discussing music. We grumble about elections and we keep going.

Still, this are fleeting moments. Tiny wisps of air – thought – and then I am forging forward.. Clearing cobwebs, applying to jobs, writing, honing skills, developing business ideas. Moving – multiple times – physically. Trying on new neighborhoods like the clothes I used to get in boxes.

I look forward to, or at least desire more job interviews. Today, this week it feels quiet. Nothing on the docket. An odd thing for me. Too much time on my hands to write my daily blog. The words hit the page and I am already processing the shifts in Day 7. Way past my bedtime though. My body is screaming to go to bed, to rest to feel connected to the All-That-Is.

Spirit and soul. The long-lost lover floating eternally by my side. The wispy darkness, that always taunts to drag me under. Hope springs eternal that it will all be all right...it has to be. What else is possible?

#2018 #frustrations #financialhealth #betterchoices #ancestraltrauma #innerwork #selfhelp #energy #wellness #connectiontoself #soul #Transformation #bestself #patterns #process #mind #mindset #intuition #community #newoutlook #career #learning #finances #heart

Stories of Wandering Duluth - Tourist and Marketer

Recently, I visited Duluth Minnesota to attend the Zenith Digital Marketing Conference 2017.

Last year, I attended Zenith 2016, not long after having graduated with my MBA in Integrated Marketing. While we learned various integrated marketing basics in school along with our business education, it is not until you enter the real world that the true work begins. Zenith was a part of that for me. To be surrounded by marketers and marketing language and the all the sub-culture attributes was like being a kid in a candy store.

Now that I have cut my teeth covering events for MIMA and working on the Irish Fair’s marketing plan, I ventured there again. This time, with awareness and experience under my belt. Rather than rush, I wanted to spend more time relaxing and integrating my time away from my day job.

Night One:

I ventured out to “see the town.” So, downtown Duluth is not exactly hopping on a Wednesday night. In fact, by the time I checked in, most of the stores were closed or closing for the day. Snow was wafting down from the skies, as it had been ever since I stopped for bakery at Tobies.

I stayed at the Radisson, a round building known for their moving restaurant. It wasn’t open for the season yet. After walking around for a bit, I decided to stop in at The Blind Pig, a local café. Upon entering, the door attendant suggested I go see and try out the Rathskeller, an additional bar area in the basement below. He said, “Pick floor Minus One, not One. One is a creepy basement area used for storage.” Duly noted. Indeed, the elevator button was (-1) According to the website, this used to be the old prison.

The place was virtually empty when I arrived, except for two local regulars enjoying whiskey. As it turned out, it was “Whiskey Wednesday” at The Blind Pig/Rathskeller. I don’t normally do the whiskey but “when in Rome.” By my 2nd glass, I enjoyed a peaty number that tasted of burned gasoline – but it fit with the musty cellar and ghost stories. Yes, I even got to see the picture of one of the resident ghosts that showed up as a very distinct grey outline on someone’s photo (shown to me by the bartender on his phone).

One of the jokes tossed out was about a friend of the two regulars who lived up north near the border. “He’s practically Canadian, he lives right there on the border.” To which the bartender said, “Well, he probably just wants to jump right over about now and be Canadian.” Referring, I am sure to our political situation here in the States. Some talk about fishing and the weather.

After my time at -1 was done, I needed food, so I headed back up the elevator to floor 2 or was it 3. I ordered the house special, lamb Shawarma. On stage, a local band called WhiskeyTrail played country covers. I found my foot tapping and myself singing along. I only had few bucks left so my tip was small. I saw on their FB page that someone recently gave them $50. I felt a bit unprepared.

Course, I was lucky to be in Duluth at all. Building my career has been rough going. Volunteering my time, attending conferences with my own resources since my current role isn’t marketing related. Hearing a lot of “Nos.” It takes a lot of tenacity. I try not to eat too many ramen noodles, but I know that is a famous story of people wanting to follow a dream. Maybe it isn’t ramen noodles but small tips, or scraping up the money to take the next step and hoping it all works out.

Day Two:

I head out early – 7:30am. Since the hotel shuttle doesn’t start until 9am, I am on my own to walk to the Greysolon Ballroom – an event space near The Blind Pig. The weather is cool, a few snowflakes fall and the ground is wet but I am excited to be here.

After getting breakfast and coffee and settling down, Marty Weintraub - founder of AimClear - kicks off the morning’s Keynote by taking a picture of us all with his fisheye lens. From morning until about 4:30pm when everything wraps up for happy hour, we’re running around learning. Given that I am attending MIMA events at least twice a month, it is amazing how much I have learned and retained since the process started a year ago. Acronyms like SEO (search engine optimization) and AI (artificial intelligence) are familiar to me and that includes typical uses for brands.

When the day wraps up, we’re all ready for the after party at Blacklist Artisan Ales. , a new brew pub featuring Belgian-Inspired beer. A Canadian friend suggested the night before that I visit “Last Place on Earth.” When I looked it up, it was “permanently closed.” Turned out he was joking (I think). Why? Because the proprietor of the “head shop” was in jail.

Little did I know, until our group took the brewery tour that we were actually in the same space! One of the Duluthian’s explained that the previous owner had been investigated for some time for selling something called “Bath Salts,” which in theory could have been bath salts but when smoked or eaten or whatever someone crazy would do with those, were an illegal narcotic. Lovely. Seedy under-belly of Duluth.

Over the course of the evening, I met and talked with marketers, mostly from Duluth, but others were sole proprietors from the Twin Cities or students. I mentioned more in my previous blog. Katie and I ended up talking with one of the owners Jon Loss of Blacklist and his partner Elissa and getting into the nitty-gritty of beer making in the tour. From one type of chemistry to another, I suppose.

We discussed marketing strategy and ideas. It felt good to be here. Article about Black List

Day Three:

Went out for breakfast and ended up at the Holiday Inn’s restaurant near my hotel, so that I wouldn’t waste too much time. Nora, my waitress was nowhere to be found so the back-up helped and soon I was rocking and rolling with steak, eggs, pancakes and coffee. Took care of business and writing for several hours in the hotel lobby after check-out. Then I headed out to Namaste, a healing store.

Just my kind of place – candles, spiritual statues of gods and goddesses, healing books and crystals. The feeling in there was so amazing. If I could, I would have taken a few large crystals home with me. There were beautiful lava rocks and large columns. Immediately I was drawn to Quan Yin, a goddess I work with extensively in Transforming Blockages. In the end, I took a couple of candles for my altar and incense.

From Namaste, I headed across the freeway to the tanker boat. However, at 3pm, the last tour had left. Grandma’s, a known landmark restaurant on the pier, where happy hour was in full swing with ½ price drinks and cheap apps. For a tourist destination, it had its fair share of locals, and I felt out of place, maybe a little different. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the ambiance and the history showing in the old signage and photographs.

My final stop before leaving Duluth to head back to St Paul, was the local Starbucks. I drank my Mocha while charging my phone. A Somali man enjoyed his coffee while iPading in the corner and another guy listened to something on his headset while watching passersby in the window. Outside my view, the Duluth steam escaped from drain holes by the intersection.

I remembered the Blacklist owners talking the night before about how they used the steam to make beer and without it would require a much larger space and more equipment. The intersection of environment, city policy/resources and commerce.

All in all, I needed this experience of expansion in Duluth. A city full of stories, locals and seafaring folk who masquerade as brewmasters and computer geeks. The occasional marketer from AimClear, maybe. I may not know when my career will be full-time marketing, but what I do know is I love the process and where it is taking me. How else would I become so intimately connected to the thriving businesses and storytelling of this community?

Want to work with me? Coaching, healing work such as Access Consciousness Bars, Akashic Record readings and transformational energywork - bookings available online or send me an email. I accept payments/ donations through Paypal in order to sustain myself and build my business.

In addition to personal transformation, we can work on your branding and marketing also bookable via my Online booking portal. You can also provide donations/trades of the following: acupuncture, chiropractic, massage, food, gas, pay for my Internet or anything you can suggest. Look forward to working with you!

#Duluth #Travel #Zenith2017 #Marketing #EvolutionaryLove #Transformation #Food #career #networking #blog #conferences #learning #personaljourney #life #business #trust #process #mindset #Authenticity #community #Journey #Spirituality #creative

New Year's 2016 and the Reset Begins with a BIG PARTY!

New Year’s Eve I cleaned my studio apartment, set-up my cleanse journal and sorted my cabinets so I knew what items I needed at the store for the Ultimate Reset cleanse. The fridge was bare except for a couple take-out boxes and a ½ of Jane’s pecan pie we ate for Christmas.

I threw all that out along with the desiccated carrots leftover from one of the summer farmer’s markets.

24 hours left of 2016 and I was ready to leave all that the year entailed behind. The Universe had other plans though. Money I was expecting didn’t come on time.

A ritual of lack that I was used to after several years of a mysterious financial connection to Mercury Retrogrades. You could pretty much predict the size of my bank balance and the various calamities related to money by the constellations and where Mercury was situated in the night sky. I kid you not. At one point in the last few years, I had minus numbers in my bank account the entire six weeks. Ramen and free meals became the norm.

Fourth Mercury Retrograde of 2016, on the last day of the personally tumultuous eight-year cycle we were leaving behind and this one was no exception. I had to fill my fridge and my pantry with groceries for the cleanse. I will spare readers the gory details which included a long wait in the way of last minute shoppers at Whole Foods while I sorted out my miscalculations with already bagged groceries. After a long string of these Mercury driven disasters you get very creative with how you pull things off.

$250 worth of organic produce procured with a brilliant work-around later I drove home to discover I was missing a bag of limes and I was charged twice for my asparagus. The Universe was going to get the last laugh, after all.

I’ve had this weird relationship to food. I love it, that is for sure. Especially when it is lovingly prepared and comes with a beautiful experience. Still, the way I eat sometimes, you’d think I had some past-life recollection of feast and famine in my memory banks. If I get $100 from somewhere you can guarantee a long night at Meritage or Sainte Dinette is in the works. I’ll feel like a Queen and enjoy every last tasty morsel – just in case I don’t get another opportunity.

On the other hand, I don’t get much pleasure from cooking for myself. Here and there I have dabbled successfully and promised myself it would become a trend. The lure of our amazing local farm-to-table style restaurants though soon pulls be back out, night after night. Cooking is tedious, requires washing-up and never tastes as good as someone else’s. Most of the time, it doesn’t taste good at all. I really dislike leftovers.

I did the Ultimate Cleanse once before. Last year, right after the MBA. I’d gained like 50 lbs during my two years in school, had high blood pressure and bad cholesterol. I figured it would help me get back into shape. 2016 was a fickle friend though. I cheated just a bit throughout the cleanse, including beer and wine at the curling club, restaurant meals when I was too tired and potluck samplings at work.

Still I lost weight and ate better for quite some time, until I didn’t and stuff happened and it got too hard to keep up with it all. My career and financial issues, my devastating inter-personal crises, my brother’s wedding, my gut-wrenching come to Jesus (not literally) soul-searching. I did quite a bit of that on the patio at Ox Cart, crying into my second or third, or was it fourth glass of wine?

If 2016 was anything, it was going to make me, come hell or high water, release anything toxic and reset my emotional course from turbulent to one in which I was in the driver’s seat of my own creation. And furthermore, 2016 wasn’t going to do it in that nice motherly way one would prefer. No, it was going to send me through a stone-polishing tumbler of epic proportions and kick my ass along with multiple deaths both spiritual and actual (it got so silly we were all joking about Betty White needing our protection several days before New Year).

One good thing, I took up yoga and managed to keep up my practice fairly regularly the last half the year. I cried on my mat a few times too but the flow kept me pushing through all the crap, one downward dog at a time.

Anyway, back to New Year’s Eve. 2016 was going out with a bang. I envisioned this for weeks and nothing was going to stop me. Not even my finances.

I turned up at Sainte Dinette and there was one last chair at the bar (just for me) in a night that was non-stop from 7:30 to well after midnight.

I ate the amazing Tasting Menu Chef Adam had come up with and Tweeted about it the whole time. I thought it amusing to take pictures of everything as though this was my last meal and I’d be starving after the 2nd.

I found my interest in making every last moment count, including an after-party at Bulldog and an after after party at my neighbor Cory’s apartment, intriguing. You’d think I was going away to a deserted island for a month, not just doing a cleanse. It was as if my life was over as I knew it and I was on some sort of death bed. Still, I had fun. I made sure of it.

I even got a post New Year drunken kiss like in the movies. Hadn't done that in awhile. There's just something fun about being in the moment, a man's hand on your thigh, a full belly and New Year's cheer going on all around. All of us were laughing and drinking. Cory and his sister were practicing their Norwegian. You can't make this shit up.

This morning I went to brunch at St Paul Grill, one of the only places open around downtown St Paul, which was like a ghost town otherwise. Not even the ice rink in Rice Park was open. I walked past Meritage and saw the remnants of last night’s New Year celebration – hats and other items piled up on a table.

I’d spent Christmas Eve at Meritage enjoying (yet another $100 meal) with families decked out in Christmas sweaters and other red-hued finery. I chose Sainte Dinette because I feel at home there and Laurel, the GM gives good hugs. Real ones where your hearts meld as one. She’s the best.

I don't think I know one single restaurant GM anywhere who runs up to you with a genuine smile on their face and offers hugs. Laurel lives in my building. I feel like we are friends now. Maybe one day I'll have my wedding there like the one couple I spoke to a few weeks ago. Course I'd actually manifest my committed relationship. Lord knows THAT didn't happen for me in 2016.

Back at St Paul Grill, I ate my very large brunch - steak and eggs with hashbrowns and a side of waffle - washed down with a spicey Bloody Mary. I got a glass of wine after (free by way of a mistake) and sat there and read Cheryl Strayed’s Wild.

Wow! she and I have very little in common other than Minneapolis but something about the way she dances with her words and describes human suffering stuck me to my core. This world does some crazy stuff to us and it always surprises me somedays how any of us survive and yet we do…clinging to the hope that tomorrow will be better.

Now it is the early evening of the New Year’s Day. I am thinking I should start my prep work for tomorrow's cleanse Day 1 and see how far I get.

Although I really want to get back to reading Cheryl’s book too. It feels like Monday today for some reason but it isn’t. Nevertheless tomorrow, which is the actual Monday I begin a process I have thought about for a very long time. The day has finally arrived. We'll start 2017 out with a very different sort of bang.

And this time - no coffee, caffiene or alchohol for three weeks!

If you want to help support my career transition and book publishing business - I am still running my YouCaring.com campaign. You can also reach me personally for direct donations and I take PayPal or schedule a coaching/healing session. https://www.youcaring.com/ginasmovinonupcampaign

#NewYear2016 #mindset #Food #SainteDinette #Meritage #Spirituality #creativity #creative #learning #Winning #knowing #community #personaljourney #family #Innerlandscapes #energyclearing #Money #SoulJourney #Healing #yoga #process #Journey #SacredJourney #finances #Love #selflove #writing

Change in Year, Change in Attitude: Lessons of the Opening Heart

I’ve been quiet on my blog for a few weeks now.

As soon as some idea or thought would coalesce it would just as soon dissipate. Maybe I wasn’t that grounded or things changed too fast.

I’ve had three T3/Emotioncode sessions with Peg at this point. The last one was Sunday for an hour. We dug in deeply to some limiting beliefs and emotional heartwalls. Inherited thought-forms from the female line. A few things from the Dad’s side and a shit ton of old stuff that simply wasn’t serving me.

My list of positive belief systems has grown from 4 when I had session one to 18. I have them tacked to my cube wall at work and glance over periodically to reinforce them in my psyche.

It’s the first 24 hours since the session and I felt my ego or some aspect of myself resisting the change. The voice lobbed out some real doozies like “F-U for making these changes, they’ll never work!” and “Go away!”

Lovely.

On the other side, my heart and soul feel lighter and more energetic since the session. My knees which had been bothering me for weeks seem to be free of pain. That mind-body connection, was a strong one.

I continue my work with Stacy Nelson’s MasterSoul University. I purchased a mala from her shop so I could perform Ho’pono’pono and other mantras and actually be able to count using 108 beads instead of the excel spreadsheet I had been using. That felt a little too office-y for forgiveness rituals. Also, I wanted something pretty to wear.

My appearance has been a huge thing for me recently. I joined Stitch Fix so I could try it out and see if the stylists/box in the mail idea would work for me. I figured I’d give it a few tries and see. I made an appointment for a facial. I bought my favorite skincare line. I don’t think this is a superficial process for me. I feel it is vibrational. I am going after gold and want to express the process outwardly as well as inwardly.

I received via email 22 book cover concepts from Renee for Cassandra & Abbie: A Journey in Letting Go. I let those images percolate over the weekend after I’d narrowed it down to two I felt expressed the energy of the writing and picked the winner this morning. I am eager to have her finalize it so I can upload it to the site. Of course, that means I have the structure in place to finish writing. Let’s see how the inspiration flows.

Without all the support and processes I learned in MasterSoul, I don’t think I would have gotten as far as book covers. I had to relearn how to create and manifest. While we’re still learning, I am already seeing results using the techniques and that is a harbinger of things to come for me.

I think I need to apply these techniques a little more deliberately with the job hunt too. I finished Stacy’s Inner Council book and I know I need to start to identify The Council in my mind and work with them. I am taking the first week in January off to clean-up my storage and start a 21-day cleanse. I am hoping the time will also be used for getting to know The Council.

The election has been challenging for my family of origin. We weren’t all aligned in that process and bickering still seems to arise with the polarity of left and right. My Dad and I worked on new tires for my vehicle and everything was going smoothly until he got into it with my brother about politics. I got drawn into it with an email about “hope you enjoy your new tires from your conservative father.”

Eesh. I find myself having to raise the vibration and the energy of these exchanges after I pick myself up. What is the management response to this? How do I handle a difficult and sticky situation?

I dove into and started reading Megyn Kelly’s Settle for More over the weekend. My Dad sent it to me as part of what I call our regular book club. I get new books as a surprise every few weeks. He just started doing that a couple years ago and I always learn something from his choices.

I don’t identify with everything in her book but she knows how to tell a good personal story. I find myself excited to keep reading and wonder how situations will play out for her. I don’t know how much patience she’d have for how it works for an empath when it comes to her “work hard to get somewhere” philosophy. Working all those hours and pushing personal limits constantly, typically gets an empath sick. She appears to have learned deep lessons in vulnerability in recent years, however.

I for one am unlearning a lot of that philosophy and learning how to have more ease, have things arrive in an easier fashion that doesn't involve masculine pushing, go with the flow of universal timing so that when something does manifest like a job, it seems to just fall out of the sky. I may be new to it and shaky on the particulars, but I think I am actually seeing it working – finally.

All in all, my attitude and my heart has shifted a great deal. 2016 may be a 9 year but we’re all hoping it is worth it in the end.

PS for those keeping tabs on the dude from the agency who sent me a form “thanks but no thanks email” after I had met him in person a few times and to whom I responded with a euphoric “so glad to have met you at such and such events.” I did see him again at the MIMA Holiday Party last week. He seemed to be busy running in the opposite direction. :)

If you want to help support my career transition - I am still running my YouCaring.com campaign. While I did have some donations in the previous round, I have additional networking/conference type events, up keep on this website and other processes to go. You can also reach me personally for direct donations and I take PayPal. https://www.youcaring.com/ginasmovinonupcampaign

#MegynKelly #SettleforMore #StacyNelson #InnerCouncil #jobs #jobsearching #EmotionCode #empathic #empath #Election #Marketing #mindset #Winning #YouCaring #knowing #business #energyclearing #community #family #MIMA #Healing #personaljourney #SoulJourney #Authenticity #Heartwalls #life #Vulnerability #Journey #story

Thanksgiving: Gratitude & Attitude on the Journey

Coming off an amazing Thanksgiving with my friend Lawrence at his new house where I bonded with his son and we played with shoes and shared pie.

I’ve been pushing the healing work since the weekend. Remi from Twinflame Healers and I have been corresponding back and forth. I’m trying to work on my ability to receive in the Soul Love work. It sounds easy but receiving is complex. Your mind likes to play tricks. "Oh Sure!, I am receiving," it says. However your bank account and your love life don't show that you are at all.

I had a T3 session with an EmotionCode/BodyCode/T3 practitioner. I knew I had this heart-wall (or maybe it is more than one) which affected my abundance. I’d been working with someone who released a lot of surrounding issues over the course of the summer but the body wouldn’t let go of the wall. When she went through a personal crises and couldn’t continue the work, the whole thing stayed on the back burner -- until Monday.

I’m trying to read Stacy Nelson’s Inner Council book and can’t concentrate. I haven't been sleeping well lately - strange dreams at night wake me up around 3am and I can't get back to sleep. I lay in bed tossing and turning.

The job hunt has been long and protracted. Monday I was feeling the heaviness of it.I turned in (yet another) draft of the finance articles and my blog for MIMA on the Pinterest talk. Meanwhile, Monday I got a ‘no’ response from an agency where I applied recently. The CEO had come to our class on social media. We’d read his book. Apparently that was not enough.

Wednesday night I ran into my friend Jesse. He wants to be more involved in my job hunt and thinks he has the skills to assist me in making this jump. I'm grateful for his stepping in here. Hopefully we can put our minds to good use in the months to come.

Now I realize that when I came out of film school in 1998, a complete emotional wreak, there was no way I would have made it in Hollywood. I am in the Hollywood of the mid-west and it takes energetic balls, tenacity, and emotional doggedness…if I had an ego, it has been honed with these rejection notices from marketing agencies and the closed-door policies of the creatives. It takes attitude to weather the ups and downs and keep going.

In the meantime, I am truly grateful for this process. I have gotten out of the house more often and met more interesting people since school let out. I’ve been forced to address long-standing energetic and personal limits. I’ve cried a lot and laughed even more. I’ve tested myself in ways I never thought possible and came out the other side of the crucible a stronger mind.

That doesn’t mean that I am not looking forward to 2017 (one year). This nine year can kick-it. Course, before the nine year completes – we do have one more, pesky Mercury Retrograde to get through.

#MBA #Marketing #mindset #YouCaring #business #empath #community #creativity #jobsearching #MIMA #personaljourney #Money #curling #SoulJourney #career #jobs #Authenticity #networking #Writing #change #life #writing #energyclearing #EmotionCode #Heartwalls

Big Lessons, Realism and the Journey of Being Me

Unclear whether recent events have taught me BIG lessons or just moved me around the playing field of life.

A few months ago, in the height of my spiral, I had to get my phone screen repaired. The iPhone6 had never really worked properly – in my mind. I miss Steve.

The iOS was buggy after purchase; I had issues almost right away with not having enough memory. I was told it would be fixed if I got all my photos and videos off of it. I got extra storage at the cost of .99c a month – only to find that was not REALLY the issue. The issue was that 16GB disappears fast with even normal app use.

Then just as I was about to dive in and replace it – the phone dropped (or I dropped the phone) and the screen was once again cracked. Verizon (or anyone actually) won’t replace the phone during the middle of a contract with a cracked screen.

Back to square one.

The phone continued not to let me take photos – I go to events for MIMA, and myself and I can’t take pictures or do much really – it is slow to respond and gives me “storage full” notices. I can’t do anything about that – it’s not the area of storage covered by the icloud. All of that is a racket. Apps are loaded onto the phone so you need GB. They don’t tell you that when they are selling you phones.

Today I am back at Batteries Plus getting a phone repair so I can start this ridiculous process over again. If you asked me why I am looping on this issue, I couldn’t tell you. The first time I went to look at phones, the screen was still good but my phone hadn’t backed up in months. When you go from iPhone to Google, they can’t guarantee that all iPhone features will transfer and I had a lot of interesting notes and other information. I wanted to back it up or transfer it elsewhere. By the time I had backed it up, the phone screen was cracked (AGAIN).

The election process…

After the new member breakfast, my emails to the HR person went unanswered. So much enthusiam during the handshakes. Leading to NOTHING. Dead air. That was disappointing but not every lead turns into something, I suppose?

Then my mind starts going. Did it have anything to do with the fact that I updated my resume post event with my MIMA and other content work (was so proud of my byline) and somehow while I was PDFing the formatting got off? I didn’t notice.

It was early in the morning, I was late for work and trying to get things done. I sent it. Realized over the weekend. Tried to be transparent about it and sent a revision. Guess they weren’t my people? Or maybe I am over-analyzing for some informational interviews. It is true. I haven't had a technically "real" interview since March. No one knows why. The feedback on the resume is that it's great.

I completed revision 2 of the content articles for the subsidiary. Waiting on a response there. It took a lot for me to get back to them but once I put the earbuds in and got to work, all that “uninspired” stuff dropped off. I became one with the work. Still, I know I have more to offer than just content creation for SEO of dry financial advice. Strategy. Planning. Inspiration. Laughter. Iteration.

I attended the MIMA talk this morning and other than having to type a mile a minute to keep up with the presenter, I learned a lot about Pinterest. Who knew that boards and pinning could be so interesting? I left feeling inspired. He showed us ads and other creative work for certain case study brands and I was thinking, 'there that's what I want to be doing!' How do you get to do that work?

Been a tough week. Monday, I attended a Citizen’s League event in Minneapolis where a panel of very intelligent political commentators discussed the results of the recent General Election – mostly MN results but including the wider experience. The Trump Victory – some call a landslide. I call it the most intense week of my life so far. Had to channel back. Still not fully recovered.

I thought I might learn something. I learned that politics, while exciting in some ways isn’t my mission. I may like speaking up but perhaps the point here is, go create your own existence! I’m a mile a minute healing traumas as they arise. Money is shaky. Especially after (YET ANOTHER) phone screen repair for a phone I will (HOPEFULLY) be rid of by the evening.

What a drag.

I got my notice to renew my lease. Thought about it all night. Had a dream I was visiting Melania Trump’s house. She had really expensive make-up and skin products. She was very miserly about them. She tried to be nice – like, “hey this cream is so awesome! Try it.” But she’d only give you a too small amount to make a difference and I felt her freaking out about sharing a dab of $400 wrinkle product. She hoarded cake. She was pregnant again but didn’t seem all that happy. Everything was fake.

Do I move or stay? Well I am between a rock and hard place. If I give up my spot, I may not find another one. I don’t like the odds of the credit check. So would that force me in with roommates in some college pad out there? The odds are awful. There is no way I have a deposit or anything else saved up so my parents would in some way need to be involved. OR that benefactor. After the screen repair and the new phone, I am unclear how I will eat this week.

Meanwhile my volunteer activities are doing well. No one is apparently hiring for real jobs. I haven’t met anyone at these events that seems more intelligent or capable than I, so that's not the issue. Divine timing? Budget cuts? I just don’t get it. If Melania’s world is fake, mine is all too real. And the realism is starting to get to me.

#MBA #Election #Trump #learning #Marketing #mindset #MIMA #YouCaring #business #empath #knowing #community #creativity #jobsearching #personaljourney #Healing #career #Authenticity #family #Money #Innerlandscapes #Vulnerability #networking #SacredJourney

Finding our True Voice Post-US Election

The US election has been the most unusual back-drop for my career change that I can imagine.

After attending the MIMA new member breakfast, Wednesday, my first MIMA blog was posted.

Meanwhile I am working on articles for our subsidiary website. I don’t know if I am a marketing intern or consultant, it is an unofficial position, however the results are real.

I have empathically witnessed and processed the protests post-election, the very real pain of my friends who had hoped for a Hillary win and the abject gloating of those who were in the Trump campaign. I decided to get more vocal about my thoughts on the subject. To present what I was seeing and feeling.

There are those who are proponents of “let live,” and others who are upset, and still others who find a certain personal power has been unleashed. My creative juices are on fire.

I don’t believe we can get through this time without a lot of creativity. What we will see in each other has just begun to surface and lot of it isn’t nice. I think it is dark days. Maybe the chaos will lead to better things…but not before we are spun around backward.

I attended the NAWMBA meeting at St Kate’s Thursday night in which MBA Director, Michelle Wieser presented findings from her PhD research on MBA salaries and the gender gap – which only gets worse the further we are in our careers (as women). Not surprising, maybe.

As women, we have gotten used to but are growing uneasy with the gender issues we continue to grapple with. They are real. They exist.

It has now been nine months since I graduated with my MBA and I am still working the same Executive Assistant position – no change in salary, no room for growth – and wondering when or IF I’ll break past the cap. And when I do break past the cap – will I be asked to start on the bottom, given a song and dance about my lack of experience and told “this is ALL we can give you?” That’s what I was told when I was negotiating for the job I have now.

What little deaths will I experience even after the shift?

While I have come to terms with my “volunteer” work and unofficial “marketing internship,” even now enjoying it – is it just because I have a good attitude that this is so? Would a man coming out of my MBA be told “you don’t have enough experience at an agency so go volunteer.”

Ok, so no one said that out loud. I have just read a lot of job descriptions and they’ve all underlined the requirements for agency experience – you get from doing what? Why are hiring managers so dogmatic about it? All I have experience so far are 'no' or silence from every agency/ corporation I applied to – so apparently it was applicable, despite rumors that guys get away with applying to jobs with less experience ALL the time.

If I were better networked or played softball with the Creative Director like men so often do, would these years of experience be overlooked? Is that why men get jobs they apply to without the experience?

I really don’t know the answer. Maybe no one does. I am proud of my first MIMA related byline and there will be more to come.

Eventually my articles will be published on the subsidiary website too Who knows, I could pick up some other gigs as the months unfold. No one can say I am not trying hard enough.

One of my fellow cohort members said “you get around.” Meaning all my posts and blogs on my process here and all the networking events or conferences. Yep. That is the kind of energy I have to put in to make this change and what it is going to take.

So what will it take for more awareness and consciousness to come to this post-election time? The traumas are wide and large. I don’t believe that pretending what is taking place is no big deal, is really the answer - like a doormat. We are each going to find our own way through. Although apathy seems ill-fated.

I see very strong Goddess-centered women coming into their own True voice, myself included.

What I know to be true, is that we are going to need different and better solutions than what have come before. We need to find our own true power. Our own voice.

I’m not going to pretend that some of the stuff I read about – attacks on the streets, racial slurs and attacks at schools and so forth doesn’t scare me. It is dark stuff. Darkness is making itself known where once it was hidden. Is that the awareness we all needed to make true CHANGE?

Perhaps.

One of my other classmates (who also attended the NAWMBA meeting) is working on a book cover and I am sure I’ll get better results than both my attempts at using Fivrr.com. If the Abbie & Cassandra book cover goes well, I might ask her to work on the Book1: Journey of Atlantis cover.

Meanwhile I guess I better get writing on both those short serials so there is actual content.

Oh. My MIMA committee chair asked me if I took pictures of the breakfast. Ugh…I still have that phone problem and my phone doesn’t take pictures. Or even work well. The screen is cracked again. Repairs are $135 and that’s before I go through the replacement costs to change it. Can I get a donation?

#Trump #empathic #Election #Marketing #learning #meetings #YouCaring #business #knowing #empath #jobsearching #energyclearing #community #creativity #MIMA #family #personaljourney #SoulJourney #career #jobs #ShortNovel #Authenticity #Money #space #selflove #writing #Healing #networking #MBA #gender #paygap

Clarity in a Sea of Crazy - is it Possible?

Clarity. Is it possible right now?

All this activity makes me feel consumed with thoughts and ideas – mostly not belonging to me.

It is not easy for an empath to continuously take in input from seminars, conferences, networking, and even PRODUCING at a fast pace. Let alone the detractors and people who give advice I can’t take.

I have noticed since I began regular energy clearings that I am able to flow better, however I still need to manage my time to allow for rest, exercise, and non-doing.

Working full-time while doing volunteer activities that are now heating up, while simultaneously clearing, expanding my energy field and working on my mission -- which does involve work on the collective energy field is WAY more than full-time for an empath. This pace is not sustainable forever and I do hope that this level of activity pays-off, allowing me to work one job and on fun projects.

I am listening to Stacy Nelson’s Master Soul University Facebook LIVE. She is talking about tools we can use to maintain clarity in manifesting while so much is going on. Good timing for me. It is nice to be a part of a supportive community process while going through everything.

Meanwhile, I am realizing that all the energy upgrades have changed my ability to really give time to basic dramas or deal with other people’s entities and lower vibrational processes. I’m finding that all the energy I have time for is the process of pushing through my own stuff here. I can’t push someone else through the door. That is their job – if they choose it. They might get left behind.

I have to be that honest – with myself, with them, with the Universe. Feelings might get hurt.

I still feel largely ‘in between.’ I have clothes and shoes that are falling apart. PJs with holes in them. I pull a sweater out and the moths have gotten to it or it’s worn bare. I know that I need to invest in new clothes. I can’t show up to networking events looking like someone who can’t manage themselves let alone $million company communication strategies.

Family guilt – like my Dad saying he’ll need to get a job for the holidays and went to Goodwill for clothes are juxtaposed with expansive thought processes on manifestation – candles, rituals, energy-clearing, working with blocks to abundance etc. It is clear I am forging my own path separate from family templates and ideals and yet, I am still dependent on my family for financial support.

Can I really wait until January for new tires or will I end up giving my power away to frugality and be in a ditch somewhere, having skidded uncontrollably on the ice. This is real shit! I think about it ALL the time. I have no idea how to navigate this position I am finding myself in.

I am waiting for the note on my door in the weeks ahead in which I’ll have to consider my 2017 lease arrangement. Moving is expensive. Will moving even help me at this point? Or, am I better off paying my current rent to stay put. My place has beautiful brick walls, a great view, an in-unit washer-dryer, free espresso machine and peace of mind. It is the one peaceful place in a sea of crazy.

So really, Universe, you want me to, while writing blogs, going to work, and attending events to be packing my shit, searching for a new (probably not as nice) apartment, hoping I find something, getting the money from my parents for the deposit, going through a credit check process, I won’t even know if I pass and then actually moving by Feb 1 – in the middle of winter in Minnesota? Is that really “for the best?”

My mind is reeling. I don’t sleep. Sometimes I wake at like 5am thinking. I cringe looking at emails in my inbox thinking either it will be another “no thank you, we found someone better” email or my parents whining about my school loan.

Meanwhile, I’ll need to rush out the door for my next breakfast meeting, leading to a drive to work for a full eight hours, a few more hours of writing articles for my own site, my volunteer work, and so forth. Constantly strategizing.

I end up at the curling club for a game, and even there, I can’t truly relax. People ask me how I am doing, or congratulate me on my MBA. I have worked very hard on accepting that congratulations without immediately snapping into a self-judgement about how I am bleeding red and still don’t have the career I envisioned when I went into the process of obtaining the creds.

My hairdresser asked me if I was dating anyone. That’s the last thing I am thinking about. Unless the person shows up with a moving van and several friends and makes my meals every night, I really don’t think they’d be much help. It is sad.

I realize my concept of relationships are that they are draining and unhelpful. I don’t have the capacity to consider for long how they could be supportive and enjoyable because I feel like I’d have to provide energy to the person I simply don’t have. I am barely functioning as is…

I’ll leave those thoughts there for now. I have nothing better to add.

If you want to help support my career transition - I am still running my YouCaring.com campaign. While I did have some donations in the previous round, I have additional networking/conference type events, up keep on this website and other processes to go. You can also reach me personally for direct donations and I take PayPal. https://www.youcaring.com/ginasmovinonupcampaign

#mindset #learning #Winning #YouCaring #business #knowing #jobsearching #energyclearing #community #creativity #family #personaljourney #curling #SoulJourney #Healing #career #jobs #Authenticity #Money #Innerlandscapes #Vulnerability #creative #Love #networking #Relationship #SacredJourney #Writing #space #selflove #empath #empathic

Cosmic Change Bullet Train Runs Through #MIMASummit and 100 Handshake Modeling

I spent yesterday attending the MIMA Summit in Minneapolis. In comparison to the lower key and smaller MN Blogger conference, MIMA was a rockstar event of marketing who’s who. Color lights, fancy lunch, snacks, drinks and an after party that zoomed by at an epic pace.

I took the day off work – probably unpaid – in order to push the energy forward on the job search, get to know the MIMA leadership and the organization itself. I joined the Marketing Committee, we’re about to create strategy for 2017 and well, it’s a job even if I don’t get paid. So dig in.

I shook a lot of hands, maybe like 100 over two days and did a lot of tweeting. I slammed even more information into my already clogged brain. I may need to sleep for a couple weeks and integrate.

Inspirational notes came from Sara Critchfield and Nora McInerny Purmort who had very different experiences creating powerful content. So I am not the only one writing from the heart, writing truth-based pieces and sometimes crying…

I left The Summit on a good note, preparing to dig deeply into the work at hand, which right now is volunteer-based. A session which involved ideation work on the future of MIMA conducted by GoKart Labs, recalled a course we had in our MBA (Creative Strategy and Innovation). I realized I knew how to ideate. The guys at the table with me over-thought it too much.

While I made new connections, telling almost everyone I met that I am post MBA, and job hunting, it was very ethereal in nature. Energy. Moving.

My boss asked me if I got any 100K job offers. “No,” I answered, “but I met a lot of people making 100K”. I keep thinking there has to be a tipping point in all this. A point in which the energy expended and expanded becomes the thing you are creating. Physical.

The more I show up the more I learn. My conversations become grounded in the lexicon and the knowing. The trust I know what I know increases. I need to be doing this.

Still, I came away exhausted and tired, in need of rest from the constant “on-ness” of networking events where everyone walks around like a rockstar in a suit jacket, skinny jeans and cute booties. I felt like I needed a new wardrobe. I am reminded of the old days, in film school when we used to act, and the internal focus was ‘how do I look?’ I’m mostly over that level of narcissim but events like this come with a lot of baggage.

The other thing I learned was how much I wanted to get on stage and do a talk. I don’t have any idea what to talk about. I just saw myself doing it. None of the speakers were flawless speakers, they all lost their way at least once while on stage, lights pointed at them. Maybe I’ll start with a smaller stage and get used to it first.

Now I feel like I am in a bigger space. Waiting. I looked ahead in the calendar and really there is nothing to “DO” for awhile. I did find out about one job I want to send a resume in to over the weekend. This will necessitate doing some tweaks to my resume – adding MIMA, adding my conference attendance, maybe see if there is anything to add on content creation.

Probably time to balance though. I need to integrate. Rest. Recoup from the people stuff. I plan to curl on Saturday in the All American which is very physical, very grounded work with the granite stones and the focus on the body itself. I’ll be sore by the end of it.

Honestly I was happy to come back to my regular day job Thursday. Familiar people like family I have been with for over two years. People I can laugh with and they know me and I know them. There’s something to be said for that level of familiarity. It may be awhile before I feel that calm in the world of marketing and business strategy.

Things, like circumstances and myself have changed a lot this year. They may change a lot more before we conclude 2016. We aren’t going back, and we can only move forward. A pace not always comfortable and certainly not consoling.

I’ll be ready for the career move proper when I am ready. I’ll know because I’ll be turning in my two-week’s notice and taking the new role. I’m obviously not ready. It hasn’t happened. I can only keep preparing and clearing and showing up when asked by my soul.

I am not even curling with a permanent team this year – both of my previous teams fell off and I decided to be a freelance sub. There were a few reasons why I didn’t want to curl on my usual night, Wednesday and so everything changed up.

In career everything is up in the air and changing, each piece of the puzzle leads to more puzzles and conjectures. There is a position out there, it hasn’t quite coalesced. I’ll be sure to let you know when it does.

In the meantime, maybe I should reach out to Nora and ask her if we can collaborate on crying, humor and authentic soul-based writing – or something. Was it weird that I wanted to run up on stage and hug her like a sister? I’m “Still Kickin’” over here too…

If you want to help support my career transition - I am still running my YouCaring.com campaign. While I did have some donations in the previous round, I have additional networking/conference type events, up keep on this website and other processes to go. You can also reach me personally for direct donations and I take PayPal

#blog #learning #mindset #Marketing #YouCaring #business #knowing #jobsearching #energyclearing #community #creativity #MIMA #personaljourney #curling #SoulJourney #career #jobs #networking #Authenticity #Money #Writing #change #life #finances #MIMASummit

Listening...Really Listening to Inner Guidance in a Moment of Panic

I have a confession to make. I read the latest post by MasterSoul University’s Stacy Nelson on listening. Listening to your intuition.

That’s what this is all about.

For a long time, I listened to everyone else BUT myself. So much so, I was like a whisper, barely in my body. Sure I walked around looking like I was IN but I was out…out there floating above somewhere and following the advice of everyone else but my inner guidance.

I got really good at telling stories that sounded good. Not lies. Just regurgitations and creating from other people’s energy fields and being a follower.

This was my path…until the day I died. Not literally. It was a spiritual death. One of many in a series of cycles of spiritual journey – a heroine’s path, winding, spiraling.

My father has an impeccable memory. He can tell stories in grave detail from childhood to present day and has everyone riveted in their seats. That same skill is used to remember every detail of my long and winding path to this moment. All the times he paid off credit cards I’d maxed out. All the school programs I’ve attended. All the money he has sent – he says six figures worth of money -- since I was born maybe, or maybe after he thought he’d be done paying at the age of 18.

The process of returning to my body may have seemed long and exacting. Long and never ending. Long and futile. My life-path number in numerology is a 33. That is Master Student. Master Student’s life path is entirely devoted to spiritual development of the most exacting type. We’re not known for easy lives or ones that fit into other’s boxes. From the time I got sickly under the age of two, with seizures and colic, to this moment, my life has not been easy.

Every healer, every experience which taught me to be more present, every struggle, every seemingly weird choice was to give me a lifetime -however long that turns out to be – of the Master Student. It’s not everyone’s Life-Path number, it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. There are some choices we make, long before we incarnate and it is not for others to dictate or to change.

My confession is, I have always been listening. It may not have appeared like I was, and for a very long time I remained hidden - pretending. I don’t think I was ever off course. What was off course was the judgement people had about where I “should” be…it permeated everything. It was not just for me. It is the judgement that exists in the very air we breathe.

We all hold a piece of the pie; some feel it more deeply. As an empath I lived it – for a long time.

Each moment we are healing. We are healing not just for ourselves but for the collective. For the soul groups, for the people who cannot and won’t see the Truth this time around. As a Master Student I am bound by Spirit and my soul to conduct healing on behalf of others even if my ego would say “fuck that I am outta here!” I always get drawn back to the center. To the work. To the spiral.

I am no Buddha or anything. I can sit in separation and frustration with the best of them. My dark cycles are really f’ing dark. I have sat in bars crying because God and I are not seeing eye-to-eye right now. I know it is futile. I know I’ll return to the connection. Just not right that moment.

Right now though, I am listening. I’ve been doing a lot of clearing work. I am surrendered to the process. We were given a volunteer price for the MIMA Summit. Still the idea of spending the money left me on the edge of my comfort zone. I don’t have a safety net here. Or so it feels. I am so used to going ‘out there’ for answers.

In here, in the zone, I tap into something greater and bigger than a spreadsheet or a self-help book on finances. Other people’s successes and journey are not mine. Mine is to be in touch with the voice inside my own soul, even it flies in the face of everyone’s opinions.

I knew I needed to be there weeks ago. I just couldn’t figure out how to pay full price. The Universe fixed that. Even then…I waited. Listening. The voice didn’t change.

Meeting new people at this pace may be exhausting for someone like me. I am asked to fill up the well with spirit rather than deplete my energy stores. Find my way through LinkedIn, social media, Twitter, conferences, get-togethers, networking events, informational interviews – business cards in hand.

Write my blog. Even if it is not perfect, especially if it is not perfect and doesn’t have original photos.

Actually, I think the stock photos are funny, at least for now. I’ll fix it – eventually.

In the meantime, I am flying on a carpet and flowing on a rapid river of change and expansion.

#blog #Marketing #learning #meetings #YouCaring #business #knowing #jobsearching #energyclearing #community #mindset #family #creativity #MIMA #personaljourney #SoulJourney #Healing #career #jobs #Vulnerability #Authenticity #Writing #process #finances #emotionalsupport #creative #trust #Journey #life

Validation on the Blog - a Journey of the Fierce Heart via #MNBlogCon

I attended my first MN Blogger Conference this past Saturday. A full day of content to improve blogs, meet bloggers and monetize your sites. What struck me as I started networking was the variety of content and the powerful potency of the written word. Whether focusing on travel, spiritual motifs, mental health or tech, bloggers are storytellers and connectors at heart. People’s lives are changed through the blogs and communities that grow from them.

At the after party, held at Rocket 55, I submitted my raffle ticket into the practical cup – in an effort to win a tote bag with bicycles. I say practical cup because the two other options included an ugly Xmas sweatshirt with cats and a wreath and a t-shirt with a dog laser-eyeing a pizza, the cat sweatshirt being the most popular amongst attendees. I ended up winning the tote. Totes!

I also talked with quite a few bloggers and techies at length about their experience at the conference, their blogs and their lives. What I witnessed was the depth of passion these writers and videocasters had for their subject and for life. The tacos may have been late, but we hardly noticed as we drank wine/beer and laughed heartily.

Weeks after I started blogging about my experiences changing careers from the perspective of the authentic, heart-based human soup, against the tide of political conspiracy theories, family dynamics and detractors, I was feeling validated and at home in this group. I may not yet have original photographs or Facebook Live events - my iphone is out of memory; I can write a whole blog about trying to get Google Photos to properly download stuff so I can free up memory - but I am in good company sharing my vision.

One woman, whose PhD research focused on change processes, said that her mentor had said that for every year of grad school you may need a year to unwind and integrate. I realized that in the rush to “prove” oneself, we can feel inadequate in the time it takes to become – who we are. Justifying our existence through a career move or job change can get in the way of our experience and aptitude for a quality maneuver.. I decided some time ago I wanted to err on the side of quality and make a move that truly reflected the new me, my future self. To become my future self, I’d be born of this soup I have been writing.

I finally could breathe deeply listening to her validate that I would be good to no one unless I took the time to be good to myself, in this one instance. That the “get a job” mentality I’d been raised with had impacted and impeded my growth as an undergrad and a grad student the first time. I wasn’t repeating history here. I needed to make a radical shift in my perceptions. It is OK to take my time, network, learn and develop my chops.

The key caveat is not making enough to live on. The rush imposed externally and internally as a habit was to not rely on outside donations or family support. Why? Some unknown template that says “that’s not the way we do things.” Maybe from now on I’ll coin that the “Ramen Noodle Template.” I must scrimp and work 3 jobs not rely on the abundance of the Universe or the support of strangers/friends who see the potential. Somehow the Ramen Noodle Template is less embarrassing then the “Abundance” template. Spiritual is bad and making moves to cheaper locations with no network (requiring one to quit their current job) is recommended even if it makes ZERO sense.

Still, no matter “what I or my family wanted with their egos” the Universe wasn’t providing. Instead it was showing me the path of a different type of success. One born on the time it takes to BE a bigger version of myself, to be happy and fulfilled, and to truly understand and feel into what I bring to the table as a strategist, storyteller and conscious Capitalist.

I don’t want to make light of how difficult a process this has been. Multiple weeks of minus numbers in my accounts, wondering if I’d get evicted from my apartment, anger at the MBA program that left me in the lurch with no recruiting program or contacts, struggling against the tide of conventional wisdom provided by parents, friends and Facebook contacts.

This was a crucible, not a vacation.

Jennifer Kane spoke in the MN Blogger Keynote address about becoming Fierce and Fearless. Her talk validated the part of me that went out on a limb asking for help, goes against the tide daily in how I write, the subject I write upon and the process. I realized as I heard her speak that while work and adjustments needed to be made to expand to a wider audience, my intention was to reach the heart of the tribe with work that matters.

Connecting with others was also a major theme of the event. Sharing the community. Building a structure that was literally bigger than ourselves and being willing to make adjustments along the way. I saw resonate themes with this job search and ‘ask for help’ journey I’d been on for a couple of months.

So I made it through the Blogger con, the dues for curling – a sport that represents community, connection and much needed physical outlet -- and many other milestones. Still no post-MBA job in sight. All the while I am lectured to and admonished – the tide is turning however as more and more, I find validating viewpoints and support outweighing the fear-based ideology of “stay the same and make us comfortable.” Don’t rock the boat. Don’t go out of the identified role.

I am manifesting this career, one grid-filling experience at a time.

Next up, more work for MIMA. I’m on the fence about The Summit but leaning toward going. However, at this point, out of PTO, I am going even further into unchartered territory. Unpaid days off, and more money spent to “hopefully” meet hiring managers who WILL know who I am. I am a bug that won't go away no matter what they think of newly minted MBAs. - they want too much money, they aren't creative, they only want Brand Manager roles, they don't have enough agency experience - I've heard it all. I'm still showing up. Eventually I'll get noticed, for the right reasons.

The plan is to finally get a real interview and that elusive offer. It’s a trick of the mind, every day. Is this really money well-spent or is staying home, staying safe and buying a new pair of shoes a better option? And by shoes I mean replace the ones I have that are falling apart. Not the cute kind.

My friend Kris said “will you be short on rent?”

I replied…rent is due in like 3 weeks, I may get a job out of this MIMA Summit. Tough call really.

#learning #Marketing #mindset #YouCaring #business #MNBlogCon #jobsearching #knowing #creativity #community #blogging #blog #MIMA #personaljourney #curling #career #family #jobs #networking #SoulJourney #Healing #Money #Authenticity #selflove #trust #Spirituality #intuition #emotionalsupport #finances

The Art of Conscious Career Development

I attended my first MIMA Marketing Committee meeting yesterday. Despite being delayed by several accidents on the way into Minneapolis on 35W, I made it – almost on time. The meeting was short, however meeting in person just feels better. Marketing is a people business to me. To be truly conscious of the story, you need to experience the whole picture.

My emotions have been all over the place this week. I attended the curling club Fall Meeting on Monday night and I find myself conflicted about the season. I don’t have a regular team. Mostly on purpose. I’m curling on different nights as a freelancer so I can be flexible with the job search. I still don’t know how I am going to pay over $300 in dues. Do I really love the sport or did I get into it rebelliously after I moved to Minnesota and now I am ambivalent? Am I ambivalent because I don’t know how to pay dues?

I ran into Kent and he said to use his name when applying to his company if something showed up on the job boards. I thanked him for his lead. I can use all the leads I can get. We exchanged contacts so I could sub on the team as needed.

Back in the room at the committee meeting, I am enjoying getting to know the few members who showed up and also discussing the plans for the future of the committee. There are a lot of juicy projects to be involved in going forward. I realize just how hungry I am to do more and to work in my new field. It’s like a dog given a new bone or something.

I have no idea where I will find the time, but I can’t just sit at home and ONLY do my day job. A day job I was bored with even before I began it two years ago but chose to do while I was in school. To be fair, I have enjoyed working at this company. For a long while my job was so busy I didn’t have time to actually think about the routine.

I think it is just me at this point. I want to sit at the table and actually make plans and strategy decisions that shape the reality of a company, or a project or a customer. If I was afraid before, I am not now. Let’s go Universe!

Anger is not an unknown emotion during the week. It wells up and then out – anger that this process I am going through now, I didn’t get to do in my twenties with everyone else (or so my mind likes to explain). Anger I didn’t get the support I needed to prosper at that time either but chose to buy into societal and family templates that left me stuck for a long time. Or maybe I was just too unconscious. Or that was just my path. Or I was not strong enough. Or I was under the influence of forces outside my control.

Actually I have no idea. It’s easy to find some pat reason for why life turned out the way it did. Complex dynamics never really seem to have easy answers. The anger dissipates as I address these factors, maybe do some Butterfly Hugs and clearing work.

Back in the conference room, the meeting wraps up. We’re all excited for next steps. I make some new social media connections for tweeting purposes and plan to do some posting for the MIMA Summit. I can’t actually attend the Summit – I don’t have anyone paying for the $600 ticket.

Energy seems flat on that point and nothing changes in the 24 hours after the meeting, even with the advent of the flash sale. I do some muscle-testing and it seems the timing is off to go now. I still have the ticket to the MIMA VIP pre-party and the MN Blogger’s conference on Saturday. Plus, in a few weeks, we’ll be meeting to work on 2017 planning for marketing MIMA. Plenty to do.

Still, patience sometimes runs thin during the days. Elation about how far I have come and all the peak experiences may wain occasionally with the nagging feeling that I am weeks or months or a year - who knows right? – away from a new job/career and the living I really need to be making to stay afloat.

Potential meets process. Peak experiences don’t exactly pay my rent or even the membership fees for these organizations or all the other daily expenses. I can understand why some social media acquaintances have gotten down on themselves during their career processes. It can be daunting to say the least.

I’m still amazed at those people who have the knack for job hopping and finding amazing new positions with what appears to be magical skill along with the salaries to seemingly do whatever they want. My magic skill is meeting interesting people at bars. What if I could make this career process as easy as my penchant for intersecting soul journies?

I know I am developing a more conscious approach here. Clearing the detritus that held me back in the past and moving into a new uncharted territory. They say when you are pushing envelopes you should feel almost constantly on edge. That would sum up this time. Edgy.

We’ll see how things unfold in the weeks to come. Meanwhile I started Stacy Nelson’s Master Soul University. It’s a community and learning around manifesting as a way of life, as an empath or intuitive business person. That’s me. I need new techniques that actually work for me, the ones I grew up with were for some other time. They failed me.

I have a Crockpot – a place to cook all my ideas. It is simmering away. I still need plenty of work on my true desires – I realized as I began that I wasn’t all that in touch with true desire. That relationship may take some time.

In the meantime, I’ll be found at MIMA meetings and networking events. See you there.

If you want to help support my career transition - I am still running my YouCaring.com campaign. While I did have some donations in the previous round, I have additional networking/conference type events, up keep on this website and other processes to go. You can also reach me personally for direct donations and I take PayPa

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