About a month ago, I ran into some friends and mentioned my attendance at the University of Washington's Certificate in Storytelling and Content Strategy. They looked at me incredulously and said, "Storytelling and marketing?"
A Journey of Magic and Mayhem
- Oct 21, 2018
- 3 min read
Updated: Feb 12, 2020
Here we are…living in the present moment. Nothing works that used to and everything falls into place which the mind will say isn’t meant to. And yet, there is this peaceful straightforwardness to the stuff that falls into place. We aren’t striving or trying too hard.
I am living in a hostel in Edina, on a bunk bed in a room with 3 or 4 other people depending on the night. Then again, maybe something else is going on too. My connection to the guy who runs the place has taken a turn I could not predict or explain when I arrived.
I was in trouble that 24 hours. The place I was living, a friend’s apartment turned sour. You could find all kinds of 3D reasons, all of them may have sounded reasonable. And yet she had been so clear it was no big deal to stay there until she moved Oct 31. Maybe even take over the apartment. Until it became a big deal.
Could it be she didn’t get the rebuilding that was going on? Or didn’t want to. I could receive the judgment and make money from it…energy flowing through me. She was probably preoccupied with her own instability.
I still can’t repay much or any debt. I’ve been to court and come up with a payment plan for the $1600 I owe on a credit card debt. And yes, they do that now and can and you have to pay it. I could beat myself up but my 10% account actually has money it for the first time solidly and my YNAB is working.
Although it isn’t easy. I can feel the tide of resources coming and going…I am in charge of whether I fall off the wagon or not.
Anyway, I was living in one place. A co-worker changed her mind. The trauma came out of my body the beat of a drum. We weren’t prepared. We were prepared – whichever perspective you take.
I spent one night in situation I’d hope never to re-live…it led to an early morning search for an Air BnB – a service I’d never used and yet I was guided to at that moment. I located a hostel in Edina.
I showed up, spent the first night in a bunk sleeping next to a troubled man named Phillip. I learned just how troubled in the weeks to come.
The next day, I was headed out to shop groceries for Instacart. I met Pedro, the young manager of the house as he was doing work around the property. He couldn’t shake hands because he had been doing something – or other and they were wet. And yet, I was struck by his face, his way of being, I suppose.
And this interest wasn’t insane or over-reaching. It just existed there like a curiosity.
As it turned out, this would be a healing place. It certainly didn’t look that way at first. The rooms are quirky and the residents quirkier. There is often a pile of dishes in the sink. The smoke of a burned pizza might permeate the living room.
My stuff is organized in a locker. And yet there is this fate about the situation I can’t explain. The story is all around me. The beat of the internal drum – shifting. I work my restaurant jobs, blog, heal…releasing the depth of my trauma through my weekly BodyCode sessions.
Then Pedro shows up to the house and the entire Universe starts to fall into place…like a grid with the tiny planets revolving. I can see the stars and the planets and move them around. And I have no idea why this is the case. Laughter is a common sound.
Then it doesn’t matter for moment if the reason I got an MBA, and volunteered and wrote blogs for free and whatever…the fact that it hasn’t materialized a career – just floats in the ethers. I have no idea if it ever will – maybe the whole point of everything I ever did was to get the point where it didn’t matter? I can be happy and content just Be-ing. Everything is as it should be.
I can dance in the living room with Pedro and find myself in this situation. Writing and telling stories and seeing where it goes. And in the morning, I have an interview with Scott Belsky. We can come back down to Earth and the MBA can return and we’ll be writing a web blog for MIMA. Life is weird. And sometimes it takes you to places you never thought you would go.
In the end, you are there realizing that "getting there" was never the intended plan.
#2018 #health #wellbeing #boundaries #frustrations #breakthrough #ancestraltrauma #Marketing #Transformation #BodyCode #soul #mind #innerwork #financialhealth #finances #selfhelp #connectiontoself #connection
- Sep 17, 2018
- 4 min read
Updated: Jul 1, 2020
The gap between August 29 and today
I haven’t written in nineteen days. In the meantime, I have moved – twice.
I am no longer living in settled housing. Maybe you could say I am unsettled.
If my sense of security was at all based on my own place to call home – it may have shifted in the four times I have lived in some other location since last October. Homes that weren’t my home. My stuff in some sort of storage.
Today, as I walked in Uptown, Minneapolis, I was remembering my time here in 2010. It was the location I lived for my first year in Minnesota. My trek took me past my second house in that first year. It’s been repainted, but the arbor which was lovingly taken care of back then, is dilapidated and skewed.
“How strange,” I thought. “Why did they paint the house and keep the broken arbor?” My alcoholic landlord is long gone. The house was sold. Time marched on.
Gifting and receiving
Earlier in the day, I had a healing session. We covered a few topics but one of them was a limiting belief that love, and money could not co-exist. I lived in some kind of either/or universe. So many of us do. What does Simone Milasas say – that most people are in the give/take universe. They are not gifting and receiving. I see evidence of that daily.
How do we change this? How do we become a Universe of gifting and receiving?
Learning something new
I conducted research today for an interview I am going to do with a speaker for an upcoming MIMA event. Cindy Gallop’s YouTube interviews and TedTalks were most definitely bold. I was immediately struck by a 60-something woman who said she mostly dated 20-year old men.
No aging points of view there. She wants to revolutionize the way we speak about sex. Make the everyday sex a natural thing, remove the shame from sharing our sex videos and talk boldly about cum.
Holy crap! I’ve been too afraid to write these blogs let alone share a sex video online. Try talking boldly about courting and true love. Wooing. Exploring the other authentically. I imagine myself giggling hysterically while making a sex video and posting it on Make Love Not Porn. But is anyone bold enough to make one with me?
Mostly, I was intrigued by Cindy's concepts about business and advertising. Female leadership. Changing the world. I wanted to do more of that.
I walked past shabby housing and several blocks of luxury apartments. I asked, “What would it take to once again have a place I could call my own?”
I thought – the difference between the $800 per month apartment that my friend rents and that luxury place might be that if I rented a $1400 per month place, I might not ever have to see my neighbor open the door completely naked while her cat escaped down the stairs. The smell of cat pee, stale cigarettes and bad vodka would probably not be an issue.
I am supposed to “live within my means” while simultaneously enjoying the dank odor of unlived lives.
What will it take to not be forced to live like this – happily pretending that it is OK?
Reducing my expenses has led me to not make as much and struggle harder. I haven’t seen what people have said are the positive results.
One of the good things about my new place for now, are the two felines that inhabit it with me. They’ve been fascinating companions so far. Two sisters, one black and one a gray tabby. They meow with incessant glee for their soft food in the morning, romp excitedly in the afternoon and sleep peacefully for hours each day. Often times, I wake in the middle of the night to one of them sleeping next to me in the bed. They seem to like being around me.
Occasionally, I catch them staring at me. Perhaps they are equally fascinated by my human behavior. What the heck could I possibly be doing on the computer all day, or something?
I had two interviews last week and one upcoming on Wednesday. Giorgio Moroder, the disco DJ who worked with Donna Summer, is in town Thursday. Meanwhile, I have no idea how I will make enough money to buy food or pay for new shoes, or make it through winter. It’s a weird kind of unknown.
Perhaps tomorrow I will concentrate on creating. Existing beyond this. Visualizing the ideal existence.
Finally obtaining the job offer or landing the paying client.
What do I do? I write stories or articles or web copy that speaks boldly about your business. We dare to take risks together, perhaps. You know you want to do things differently. Together we develop a brand that changes the planet.
We help each other build a planet where sustaining yourself, living in a nice apartment or eating properly isn’t a luxury but a birthright. We make money doing it.
Meanwhile, my mother worried today that I was speaking Minnesotan in job interviews. We live in strange times, such as these.
#2018 #Clients #boundaries #MeToo #breakthrough #ancestraltrauma #BodyCode #mind #innerwork #financialhealth #energy #selfhelp #connectiontoself #connection #soul #wellness #health #betterchoices #bestself #patterns #empath #learning #career #Marketing #finances